couple more

[Wolfe]

The father was very anxious to marry off his only daughter so he wanted to impress her date. "Do you like to screw," he says. "Huh" replied the surprised first date. "My daughter she loves to screw and she's good at it, you and her should go screw," carefully explained the father. Now very interested the boy replied, "Yes, sir." Minutes later the girl came down the stairs, kissed her father goodbye and the couple left. After only a few minutes she reappeared, furious, dress torn, hair a mess and screamed...

"Dammit, Daddy, it's the TWIST, get it straight!"
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During an etiquette class, the teacher says to her students: "If you were courting a well-educated young woman from a prominent family, and during a dinner for two you needed to go to the washroom, what would you say to her?"
Mike replies, "Wait a minute, I'm going for a pee."

The teacher says, "That would be very rude and improper on your part."

Johnny replies, "I'm sorry, I need to go to the toilet, I'll be back in a minute."

The teacher says, "That's much better, but to mention the word 'toilet' during a meal is unpleasant."

Charlie says, "My dear, please excuse me for a moment. I have to go shake hands with a personal friend whom I hope to be able to introduce to you after dinner."

At which the teacher passes out ..
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A man is driving along the road and sees a woman hitchhiking, and being a good Samaritan, gives her a lift. A little ways down the road, the woman says, "I don't want to upset you, but I think I should warn you... I'm a witch."


"What?" the man said.

"I'm a witch," the woman replied. "I can turn you into something."

"You're not a witch. There is no such thing."

"I am too a witch," she said. "I can prove it. I can turn you into something."

"Okay," the man said. "Prove it. Turn me into something." So the woman leaned over and whispered in his ear.

And sure enough, he turned into a motel.

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A koala bear was approached by a prostitute. Since he had never been with one before, he was curious and excited. They spent the night together in a hotel, and he went down on her one last time before departing.
As he was heading for the door, the prostitute yelled, "Hey! What about my money?" The koala turned, gave her a puzzled look, and shrugged his shoulders. She said, "Come here," and pulled a dictionary out of her purse. She pointed to the word "prostitute" and its definition: "has sex and gets paid"

Finally understanding, the koala borrowed her dictionary, turned to the word "koala", and showed her: "eats bush and leaves"